The future of drug sniffing dogs and other random thoughts

Be patient. It takes a while to wile away the hours. (Actually, it only takes an ‘h’.)

To be honest, I’m tired of Lewy body dementia. Thinking about it. Talking about it. Writing about it. Living with it.

And what have I learned in the six years? That it’s good to have a few pairs of stretch pants with an elastic waist band. Constipation and bloating are some of Lewy’s most uncomfortable symptoms, and you will be more comfortable with pants that stretch nicely at the waist. You know, the kind pregnant women wear. Two of my daughters have just had babies and I remember thinking at one point that golly gee I look more pregnant than they do.

A reminder tip to stay attuned to the affects of low blood pressure, hypotension, to avoid passing out.

I believe I’ve warned about this before in this space, but it’s important. That dizzy feeling you get when you stand up too quick. Over the years, I’ve learned to catch myself. In one fall I wasn’t so lucky. I got stitches after hitting the first couple of stairs. I’ve lived and learned to take deep breaths now when I go up the stairs and beforehand. Also, before your journey, put your head between your legs and kiss … oops, that was an adolescent intrusion into my brain.

Seriously, put your head down and feel the blood come back to your brain before you stand up. w

Or while doing stand-up comedy even. Take my brain, here literally take my brain. It’s got a lot of wear and tear on it, so go head and take it.

Another tip, while we are on tips: Increase salt intake. But please, consult your doctor first. High salt levels increase the chances of stroke.

What else is there? Oh right this is a random thoughts column so I can go anywhere I want. How about Maine. About six weeks ago I went there for some R&R with my wife, Catherine. We saw gorgeous fall colors, and ate delicious lobster.

Did you know that Maine is the only state in the U.S. with a one-syllable name. And those who make Maine their home are called Mainers.

‘Mainers’ are looking forward to great weather this weekend. chirped the weather woman on a local channel.

We stayed in the Bar Harbor area close to Arcadia National Forest. One observation: the roads were incredibly smooth, an indication that Mainers are on top of the quality road thing. Only downside is that we had to single-lane it and slow down several times due to road construction and repair.

You get what you pay for I suppose. Except for when it come to lobster. We bought two freshly steamed lobsters for a total of just over $25. Total! We got the lobsters in a grocery story, steaming while we waited. One and half pounds of meat is on each lobster they told us.

Speaking of animals. I said speaking of animals, what about drug sniffing dogs. Are they going to be unemployed as more and more states legalize marijuana, which is by far the main substance that has led trained dogs to turn a traffic stop into a crime scene.

Guess the dogs can put in a transfer to the tracking lost humans department.